"Don't Ask, Don't Tell" ...From "60 Minutes"

"Despite the 'don't ask, don't tell' policy, gay soldiers say that commanders are reluctant to discharge key personnel - even those openly gay - in the middle of a war."
--- 60 Minutes

Part One:


Part Two:

"Gay or Straight?" ...From "60 Minutes"

"What makes you gay or straight?
Is it personal choice or genes or the way you were raised?
While science doesn't have definitive answers, there's been some fascinating and oftentimes controversial research that is beginning to provide some clues."
--- 60 Minutes


Part One:


Part Two:

Stop the Hate

Hate crimes are heartless. There are no words to describe the pain inflicted in the world by these senseless acts.

To us, this spoke volumes...

The following video (which is about 10 minutes, a little lengthy, we know!) is a beautiful tribute to individuals that lost their lives at the hand of someone who just didn't understand and respect their differences.

Grab a tissue...you might need it.



Every face has story.
Every story has a face.

Every face has name.
Every name has face.

Remember these faces, remember these stories, and remember their names.
It is in their honor and in their memory, that we fight and stand up against hate crimes.

Thank you for allowing us to share this with you!

Let's Bring People Together!!

"Stereotyping can be reduced by bringing people together. When they discover the other people are not as the stereotype, the immediate evidence creates dissonance that leads to improved thoughts about the other group." --- The Nature of Prejudice

Just a little something that we wanted to share...



...in hopes of bringing people together.

Just like you can't judge a book by its cover, you can't judge people by their cover either.

Don't assume someone is or isn't gay by their appearance.

Falling in Love is Universal

Love.

Love is a beautiful thing.

Gay or straight...love is love, and it's a beautiful thing.

California Senator Sheila Kuehl once said...

"Gay and lesbian people fall in love. We settle down. We commit our lives to one another. We raise our children. We protect them. We try to be good citizens."

We stumbled across a simple, yet inspiring explanation for love.

Open up your heart, and enjoy!

To borrow some very famous words from the wonderful Dr. Seuss..."Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

An Elephant, a Donkey, and Gay Marriage

On May 15, 2008 the California Supreme Court ruled that it would allow same-sex couples to legally marry, with all the same rights afforded to heterosexual couples. As of this point only one other state, Massachusetts, allows actual marriage between homosexual couples. This is a landmark triumph for the Gay Rights Movement. Couples can begin getting married June 17th.

However, the victory could be short-lived as conservatives in the state are pushing even harder for a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage to appear on California ballots in November. Such an amendment would override the Supreme Courts decision and nullify any marriages performed up to that point.

The video below features Republican Presidential Candidate John McCain on the Ellen DeGeneres show after this decision was made. He makes his stance very clear, and, we think, Ellen is as cool as ever.





The current happenings in California are one of many results from the long-winded debate about establishing marital rights or denying marital rights to same-sex couples all across the country. Aside from John McCain viewpoints, some politicians support civil unions or domestic partnerships, and wish to continue to reserve the term "marriage" for opposite-sex couples. But, what happened to equal rights among all? To allude to what Ellen said, marriage is marriage and love is love...whether your attracted to a person of the opposite-sex or the same-sex...its all the same.


So, what's the premise of this debate?

1. "Same-sex marriage" means legal marriage between people of the same sex. Massachusetts issues marriage licenses to same-sex couples (since 2004), and now, California has joined the bandwagon.

2. "Civil union" is a category of law that was created to extend rights to same-sex couples. These rights are recognized only in the state where the couple resided. Currently, civil unions are recognized in Vermont (since 2000), Connecticut (since 2005), New Jersey (since 2006), and New Hampshire (since 2007).

3. "Domestic partnership" is a new category of law that was created to extend rights to unmarried couples, including (but not necessarily limited to) same-sex couples. Laws vary among states, cities, and countries. Across the U.S., Hawaii, Maine, Oregon, Washington, and the District of Columbia confer certain spousal rights to same-sex couples.

In conclusion, the most significant difference between marriage and civil unions (or domestic partnerships) is that only marriage offers federal benefits and protections. More than 1,100 rights and protections are conferred to U.S. citizens upon marriage (areas affected include Social Security benefits, veterans' benefits, health insurance, Medicaid, hospital visitation, estate taxes, retirement savings, pensions, family leave, and immigration law). Because same-sex marriages in Massachusetts, civil unions, and domestic partnerships are not federally recognized, any benefits available at the state or local level are subject to federal taxation.

What's your opinion?

Visit the Human Rights Campaign Website (http://www.hrc.org/) for more information on current issues in your state and how you can get involved.

Underage Shaming

"The stigmatization of homosexuality begins early in childhood and intensifies during adolescence." --Tangney & Dearing

Despite the successes and advances of the GLBT Community, there continues to be a notion that being gay is bad. From a young age we are taught that being gay is something to be ashamed of and that, somehow, it is ok to ridicule and hurt those that are different. For youth struggling with their sexual identity, school can be an especially harsh place to be open and feel safe. As of 2003, almost 40% of GLBT youth said that they had experienced some kind of physical violence at school and 84% had been victims of verbal harassment, all because of their sexual orientation.

The effects of these degrading and shaming experiences can be devastating. Gay youth are at an increased risk for social isolation, depression, substance abuse, dropping out of school and even thoughts of suicide. In fact, of the 5,000 suicides of young men and women each year in the United States, over 30% of them have been attributed to the emotional turmoil over sexual preference and societal prejudices and discriminatory behaviors regarding same-sex attractions and relationships.

In February of this year, a California middle school had a school shooting that barely made a blip on the news radar. Why? The victim, Lawrence King, was shot and killed by a fellow student because he was gay. We think its time for a new lesson to begin.

Watch these videos for more:






For more information on this tragic event visit:
http://www.rememberinglawrence.org/.

For more information on GLBT youth, read the following article:
Snively, C. (2004). Gay-Straight Alliances. An Encyclopedia of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Culture.

Shame, Empathy, and Resilience

"Shame is something we all experience. And, while it feels like shame hides in our darkest corners, it actually tends to lurk in all of the familiar places, including appearance and body image, motherhood, family, parenting, money and work, mental and physical health, addication, sex, aging, and religion."
-- Brene Brown, PhD, LMSW

Dr. Brown, our educator and renowned shame researcher, defines shame as "the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging."

After a decade of researching shame in the lives of many men and women across the United States, she developed a grounded theory known as the Shame Resilience Model.

Watch the video below to learn more about this concept of shame and the Shame Resilience Model. What better way to learn than from the researcher herself?



Through reading the postings on this blog, our hope is to highlight each of the elements of the Shame Resilience Model with regard to the shame experiences within the GLBT Community. The elements are as follows:

1) recognizing shame and triggers,
2) practicing critical awareness,
3) reaching out, and
4) speaking shame.

The goal is to build empathy and compassion for the GLBT Community.
Dr. Brown cites Teresa Wiseman, a nursing scholar in England, who identifies four defining attributes of empathy, which are:
1) to be able to see the world as others see it
2) to be non-judgmental
3) to understand another person's feelings
4) to communicate your understanding of that person's feelings.

Dr. Brown cites Pema Chodron, who describes the concept of compassion in her book The Places That Scare You by writing, "When we practice generating compassion, we can expect to experience the fear of our pain. Compassion practice is daring. It involves learning to relax and allow ourselves to move gently toward what scares us. The trick to going this is to stay with emotional distress without tightening into aversion, to let fear soften us rather than harden into resistence."

We hope that through reading these posts, our fellow social work students can understand the shame experiences in the GLBT Community, examplify empathy and compassion, and learn how they can implement the Shame Resilience Model in their practice.

Details about The Shame Resilience Model can be found in Dr. Brown's book, I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn't): Telling the Truth About Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power. However, the diagram depicting the model is featured below.

Shame Resiliency Model - Upload a Document to Scribd

Read this document on Scribd: Shame Resiliency Model